Have you ever had a day where you sort of felt invisible? Like everything was a little bit for nothing and it didn't really matter how hard you tried?

This was the other night for me. I felt completely invisible. 

There’s something about moving to a new city where you know no one that’s simultaneously freeing and makes you feel like Waldo, from Where's Waldo, sans the obvious red striped shirt and beanie. 

In a conversation with my husband I explained, “I don’t know if I’m making much of an impact anymore. I’m not sure if I’m fulfilling my purpose in the same way or to the same level I was in NY. Maybe I need to be more upbeat and sparkly, perhaps my writing is too dark or my work is too vulnerable.” 

He soothed my worries, encouraged me to keep writing what was real, and we talked about how authenticity breeds lasting connection. After that I went to bed. 

Yesterday morning I released a blog on faking it and was met with the most thoughtful, powerful, loving responses. There was a slew of comments that brought me to tears and DM’s of people who shared the impact my writing has had on them and even some who explained how my words have changed their lives. 

Then there was this voicemail, which was another level of love. A friend of friend, who I adore, left me the most wonderful, thoughtful voicemail thanking me, explaining the impact, and most importantly ending with, “I just wanted to say, I see you. I hear you. I love who you are.” From the bottom of my heart, thank you. 

I’ve never felt more responded to by the Universe. It’s like through all of you, it was reminding me, to keep going with what my heart feels. I’ve never felt more loved and guided than by your response. I’ve never felt more seen. And I can’t thank you enough. 

*** This isn’t just a blog of me bragging about compliments I’ve received.***

This is the very serious message, “don’t quit 5 minutes before the miracle.” 

Our hearts know where we are supposed to be and when we listen to them, we always end up in the right place. I think what holds us up is, on occasion, our heart-led path doesn’t appear the way we hoped. Maybe its messy or disappointing bursting with setbacks and roadblocks. But the good news is, appearances aren’t the best measure of progress. It’s rare to be able to see the invisible forces merging together to create a better reality for you. Without being able to see it, the only thing left is to trust. 

I was listening to a podcast about folks who had spent an obscene amount of money on buying a gold mine. They dug for years with not even fool’s gold as a reward. The gold mine owners decided it was in their best interest to give up and sell the mine. New owners, despite the poor reports from the previous owners, took over and began digging. They reportedly dug for less than 3 feet before stumbling upon millions of dollars in gold.

Maybe you’ve been digging for a while with not much luck in sight. Maybe you’re tired. Maybe you’re not even sure why you’re digging anymore. But what if your gold is way closer than it would appear? What if it’s just a little more of you staying true to yourself and listening to what your heart is asking of you before you finally hit the mark? 

I wish after all of these years of working with the Universe, I was in a place to say, “yeah, I totally understand how the Universe works” but I still don’t. I have a grasp, an idea, but the complexities of the universe far surpass my finite brain. The Universe is constantly working, synchronizing, and showing up in unexpected ways. You can plan for what’s next, but I promise you you’ll never really know what’s next. 

So, you can’t quit on yourself. You can’t play small or deny your purpose. Don’t you dare stop digging or give up 5 minutes before the miracle happens.Even amidst doubt, watch the Universe show up for you.And if you need a little help along the way, find someone who loves you, who supports you. That will tell you to keep being yourself. Someone who reminds you of who you inherently are and helps you live in your truth when you’re having difficulty seeing which way is up. 

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